Chimp Haven

by Regular Einstein

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"...a whirlwind of a record, a burst of sweet, infectious energy from one of New York City’s most underrated talents."

--This Week in New York

New York rockers Regular Einstein return from an extended absence with Chimp Haven, a new album that puts a fresh face on their signature punk and power pop-informed indie rock. Founded in 1994 when songwriter/guitarist/singer Paula Carino met guitarist Dave Benjoya (Admiral Porkbrain, Food on You) and Andy Mattina (Gregory’s Funhouse, Solar Punch) at the venerable Fort at Sidewalk Café (where Paula was dubbed “Queen of Antifolk” for the Autumn of ’94.) A Spinal Tap-like succession of drummers and Paula’s solo stint in ‘00s failed to derail the kindred spirits and Regular Einstein were reborn in 2010 with the addition of Nancy Polstein (Cheri Knight, Will Rigby, Wirebirds) on drums.

A portion of the proceeds of this album will benefit Save the Chimps, Ft Pierce, FL, and Chimp Haven, Keithville, LA

Cover painting by Cody, one of the chimp-artists in residence at Save the Chimps


released March 20, 2015

Regular Einstein:

Paula Carino, vocals and guitar

David Benjoya, guitar, harmonica, keyboards, vocals

Andy Mattina, bass

Nancy Polstein, drums, percussion, vocals

Additional guitars by Dann Baker (Mayor Beam) and Jack Carino (Old People)

All songs written by Paula Carino (C)(P) 2015 HMS Beagle/ASCAP

Produced by Dann Baker

Recorded by Mark Spencer at Tape Kitchen, Brooklyn, NY

Mixed by Dann Baker at Excello Recording, Brooklyn, NY; Engineered by Bruce Hathaway, Ethan Donaldson, and Charles de Chants

Mastered by Scott Anthony at Storybook Sound, Maplewood, NJ

Many thanks to Neil Danziger, Pamela Grossman, Deike & Luna Benjoya, Pete Green, and Bill Gerstel



all rights reserved


Regular Einstein Brooklyn, New York

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Track Name: Mayor Beam
We're water born and live like waves, forever.

We crest and crash, we fade and flash together.

We wanna know who's out there.

We want a list of names--

exactly where to send the love and the blame.

We're blanket-shaped but live like yarn, unraveled.

We ache for laws, and crave the judge's gavel.

We wanna stop the bad guy.

We wanna yank the thread and end up pulling wool over our own heads

Far away, a flare is fired into the freezing air.

Mayor Beam is always hiding, and guiding us.

We'll soon be dirt and that's what hurts the hardest.

We're bones and hair and plasticware and stardust.

We wanna find the loophole.

We want to ease the pain of swinging at the end of the supply chain
Track Name: Jimmyville
The sidewalks of this town tilt and throw you down

And you never get anywhere

You went and built your home in the forbideen zone

And there’s poison in the air

Chorus: But tonight you’re leaving Jimmyville

You should have all along.

Tonight you’re leaving Jimmyville

To find the place where you belong

When you arrived last year

You found some comfort here

And they laughed at all your jokes

But then laughter fades and they all draw their shades

And they’re just like any folks

But tonight you’re leaving Jimmyville

A rocket to the sun

Tonight you’re leaving Jimmyville

And no you’re not the only one

Bridge: one cloudy day

They threw a big parade

Full of all the friends tht you haven’t made

The sidewalk of this town tilt and throw you down

And your bearings roll away

You never had a choice you listened to that voice

That was begging you to stay

But tonight you’re leaving Jimmyville

You followed all the signs

Tonight you’re leaving Jimmyville

And I am walking right behind.
Track Name: Three-Legged Race
Three legged race,

but the ties that bind

They start to chafe

when we're of two minds

A hidden hand keeps moving the finish line

Both wanna win

Both wanna control

This fleshy thing

that harbors the soul

Where to begin

When we're headed for different poles?

Feels like we're running in place

2-headed, 3-legged race

In the beginning, we were on the same team

A shared vision and a pretty little dream

You ice an injury and start to run out of steam

Trapped in a stifling brace

2-headed, 3-legged race

Three legged race but we've been set free

You set the pace pretty fast for me

I'll watch your back, cuz there's nothing left to see

Floating in negative space

2-headed, 3-legged race
Track Name: Hydrangea
Intro riff: C#m B A B
F# F#
Fighting for sunlight in a crowded lawn
and hating the waiting around
F# F#
Extending the petals to a stingy dawn
And draining the rain's remains from the ground
C#m B A B
F# F#
And just when it looks like the branches are bare
Forever and ever amen
F# F#
Your colors cry out like an answered prayer
And we're back in the flower business again
C#m B A B
Hey Hydrangea, you are a late bloomer too
A | A | B | B
Sun and soil have made a beautiful blue
C#m B A B
I'd never change ya, you took this long to appear
F# | F# | G# | C#m
Woke from the garden so late in the year

And after the iris has closed its eye
And the cowslips have bought the farm
And the dogwood stops barking and the tulips die
You make an entrance a slow-motion star

Hey Hydrangea, you are a late bloomer too
Sun and soil have made a beautiful blue
There's no danger that you'll fade from our eyes
The longer the waiting, the sweeter the surprise

G# | G#
And when you said you'd had enough
What were you thinking of?
G# | C#m
It doesn't seem like you've have enough love.

And the light becomes slanted and the chill creeps in
And your prone to the withers again
But you bloom where you're planted and the wisdom seeps in
And we'll see you next summer, I know.
Track Name: Bad Actor
I'm stumbling on all my lines

I fumbled the soliloquy

I wanted to pretend I'm fine

So you would not think ill of me

Cuz when you come back into town

I become a clumsy liar

I'm an amateur production of

A Streetcar Named Desire


I will always be a bad actor

Cuz I can't pretend

That I don't still love you

That we're just friends

I'm a bad actor

I'm mannered and I'm not that smart and

I'm a giant ham

I am Sensei Steven Seagall

I am Jean-Claude Van Damme


I'm Bruce Willis in Hudson Hawk

When you look into my eyes

And when you start that smooth talk

I'm Madonna in Shanghai Surprise

If Sharon Stone and Tom Cruise

had a child or two

I would cast them in a biopic

about me and you
Track Name: Evolution
We'll ride through here on motorized carts called legs
We'll live in long, low houses
We'll have very large foreheads

And maybe the true evolution is sitting down
How much taller can we get?

Someday we'll laugh about how stupid we are now
But I already feel 10,000 years behind
Track Name: Queens Tornado
Came out of nowhere, condensing from the ether.

You weren’t here or there, just a lovely dose of neither.

Awoke the sleeping ones who thought they wanted safety.

Nothing is guaranteed, except for all your needs.

Came out of nowhere, no one expected thunder.

Got into our hair and pulled us all under.

Destroyed the branches, the fragile outer layer.

But look at what remains after the cleansing rains.


You were the Queens tornado,

Cutting down everything in your path.

And like the high-powered lawyer of Siva the destroyer

You tossed it off with a laugh.

Came out of nowhere, or were we just ignoring

The things that needed care and gave us ample warning?

And it was over just as quickly as it started.

It blew the game away so we could really play.



From Forest Hills to Jamaica Bay

Flushing our sunny side away.

Came out of nowhere and gave us a decision

Rip off the bandages or suture the incision

Rebuild the problem or let it go forever?

We’re starting over…
Track Name: Chimp Haven Days
Our days of swinging

through the fruit trees

Happily winging on an Iowan breeze

Sheltered chimpanzees

Those days are ending,

our little heaven

The branches bending underneath the weight

Of two evolved primates


But I will miss those Chimp Haven days

Back to the jungle

What were we running from?

Back to the hunger

that drives you from the home,

makes you eat alone
Track Name: Old People
E | G| D | C 2x
G | G
Oh their bones are so frail
| A | A | Bb B
We should just throw 'em in jail
G | G
They can't do a back flip
A | A Bb B
Because they'll just break a hip
RIFF: E | G | D | C
D | D| C | C
Old people must go
D | D| C | C
Set them all on an ice floe
D | D| C | C + RIFF
Make room for the new old people

Oh their earlobes just droop
They can't eat nothiin' but soup
They are a living affront
To the sexual hunt

They aren't pretty or smooth
What do they actually do?
Being old old really blows
I'll never be one of those.
Track Name: Never Saw it Coming
I've always had a hard time facing up to facts.

That tell-tale raspy cough in the second act

That somewhere in the third turns tubercular

And spells the tragic end of our character.

I would always skip ahead,

No one crying, no one dead

So i never saw it coming.

Sitting in the skylab, circling the earth

No grisly end for me, and no messy birth

Floating in a free-fall, never wanting more

And never paying mind to who minds the store.

I could sense it in the air

Darkness falls on bunny lair

But i never saw it coming

Cordelia, what did you learn?

That there's fewer things as sad

As a daddy's girl without a dad

But what about contrition? And what about regret?

It's just remembering all the pain that hasn't happened yet.

I'd rather just remember the light inside your chest

That hopped inside of mine on your final breath

I would always skip ahead,

No one crying, no one dead

So i never saw it coming.
Track Name: The Good Times
I deserve a parking space
Cleveland streets aren't very safe
and I drove all this way
The doctor says he'll be alright
Sets up three chairs, we'll stay the night
and mom looks very sad

Believe me, the good times are coming soon
The good times are here

When we were kids we had a plan
To conquer and destroy the man
Like Village of the Damned
But now we finally have the chance
To pull the plug and wear the pants
It's finally in our hands

Believe me, the good times are coming soon
The good times are here

Remember when all we wanted was love?
We were stupid then

So I deserve a parking space
But I'll just circle round this place
And wait and wait and wait

Believe me, the good times are coming soon
The good times are here
Track Name: Coming to My Senses
Make it sound like a car crash
Make it sound like champagne
Make it sound like a river of coins running through your fingers
Onto my brain

Make it taste like a danish
Make it spongy and sweet
Make it taste like a heart ripped out of your rib cage
With my teeth

Make it look like an accident
That you could predict
But you couldn't prevent
Make yourself look so innocent
Make me believe I'm coming to my senses

Make it feel like November
Make it feel like new shoes
Make it feel like the bottom dropped out
And instead of sinking, instead of thinking,
We flew